Feeding time at the zoo

Tonight's feeding time at the zoo (aka tea time) was a typical example of life as our party of five.

Thing Two declared she doesn't like hammock [haddock] and was vexed by the fact that apparently one of her chips didn't have any potato in it.  Yes, really. How very dare it.  Then as usual, once everyone else had finished and she still had over half her meal left, which has as usual gone cold, she turns those saucer wide eyes upon us and whimpers that she has a tummy ache (again) and can't possibly eat anything else.  Funny how she managed to force a banana down once she saw Thing Two (having demolished his tea and tried to cadge everyone elses) be allowed some Easter egg. [Family rules state that after their main course the children have fruit, if they eat their fruit they then get a yogurt and occasionally if there is a treat to be had, they must have eaten all the aforementioned in order to get it]

Thing One assaulted our sanity as per usual with intensely irritating silliness and then tried to gas us all with a huge pump, which of course he denied producing.  The child is toxic.  Seriously, you've never smelled owt like it. Roadkill would smell more pleasant. After shovelling his food down his gullet he then proceeded to knock his cup of water, everywhere.  Poor kid has inherited my clumsiness (the smell however comes from The Husbands side...)

The Toddler threw his plate of food on the floor then proceeded to steal The Husbands, tiny handful by tiny handful pausing only to aid The Husband in making a chip buttie seemingly making the delicate process of arranging chips on bread into some adorable art form.  The banana also had a flying lesson and the yogurt was spat out.  I swear he survives on boobie juice and carpet fluff.

The kitchen resembles a trough that's in the process of making a dirty protest.

Welcome to our world.............