I'm a huge fan of chocolate brownies, I'm also very particular about them.  So often we get sold things under the guise of Brownie when what we get is a firm, dry chocolate sponge.  That is not a brownie.  Brownie should be thick, dense, moist and a wonderful marriage of gooey meets crumbly.

I was craving cake something chronic yesterday.  I had my chocolate head on and nothing else would do.  So I decided to make this messy, indulgent, filthily calorific concoction.  If chocolate had sex, this would be the orgasm.

Being dairy free and egg free should perhaps make me somewhat healthier in my approach to food.  That's utter bollocks though.  It just means you sulk more and work twice as hard to find crap you can eat.  One of these little gems is, bourbon biscuits!  (Generally supermarket own brand versions of these are both egg and dairy free)  So to make up for all the things I can't eat, I end up finding something I can eat and then proceed to eat four times more of that.  A few years ago I made some delicious Oreo cupcakes.  I don't have any Oreos but I do have Bourbon Creams.....

Merry Fudgemas

Recently the school had their annual Christmas Fare aka Hell. The weeks leading up to it we, The Parents, are continually fleeced to pay for the bloody thing through a flurry of none uniform days each one requesting a different 'contribution' such as bottles of stuff one week and chocolate the next.  Then you're expected to attend (good luck with that, they'd need wild horses to get me there) and fork out money to win the stuff back.  Genius.

This year The Spawn came home with the news that there was to be a cake stall and surprise surprise they wanted the parents to not only buy the cakes but to make them too.

Moomin doesn't really allow for baking and I won't use the oven etc whilst she's in a front carry so we needed something quick and easy, cue cheat fudge.

I have neither the time, temperament, inclination nor thermometer to actually make real bonified fudge. 

I have in the past made microwave fudge which is terribly moreish yet is more akin to Scottish Tablet in texture and crumbles (made using sugar, butter, condensed milk and vanilla)

I've seen the famous slow cooker cheats fudge recipes circulating ye old world wide web yet the thought of stirring the bastard thing every ten minutes for over an hour is simply too much exercise for me

There's another way though, using similar ingredients yet on the hob.  Granted, like it's slow cooker fudge cousin, it's not real fudge but nonetheless it's tasty and easy.
I made two varieties from the same basic recipe and method which is to gently melt 575g of chocolate (I used white) and a can of condensed milk in a pan.  Add your extras then pour into a silicone tray (I used silicone loaf tins so I could slice it rather than cut into the usual squares) leave to cool for a few hours then cut or slice.

The first batch was cookies and cream fudge.  Before pouring the melted mixture we added 3/4 of a pack of Oreos, which we'd bashed and smashed roughly into pieces, into the mix. We stirred it through, poured then finely bashed the remaining Oreos into near dust to cover the top with.

The second batch we made was festive gummy fudge.  Before pouring we mixed in a pack of Midget Gems which I'd painstaking snipped into halves.  Once poured we added sprinkles on top. The finished product looks a cross between dismembered elves and fairy lights.

The possibilities are endless.  You can use white chocolate,  orange chocolate,  mint chocolate,  plain chocolate or milk chocolate.  You can add any confectionary you choose or even flavours such as Baileys.  Knock yourself out.

Recipe: Quick, easy, tasty hob nobs

What you need:

• 8oz Self raising flour
• 8oz butter/margerine
• 8oz Porridge oats
• 8oz Caster sugar
• 1tbs Golden Syrup
• 1tbs Hot water
• 1/2 tsp Bicarb soda
• 1 tsp vanilla essence

What you do:

• Put the flour, oats and sugar in a bowl.
• Melt the butter in a pan with the hot water and the sugar.  Once melted stir in the Vanilla essence and the Bicarb. Soda.
• Add the melted mixture to the dry ingrediants and combine.
• Roll into balls and place on greased baking sheet and gemtly flatten with a fork.
• Bake until lightly golden brown, approximately 15mins.
• This makes approximately 24 biscuits and they're around 150 calories each.

Why not:

Add chocolate chips?

Add white chocolate chunks and smuched up raspberries.?

Add raisins?

Add smarties?

Cover the tops with melted chocolate?


These are really easy, really quick, cheap and tasty.